Lost in Headspace. Return Later.

This is the story he’ll never tell you, either because he can’t or because he refuses. This is why I have to protect him constantly from his own anxieties and from the rest of the world.

It started with our father. He was an angel, the most gorgeous being I can ever remember seeing. He was sent to earth as many angels are to guard over mortals and redeem souls. That’s where he met Mother. She was pretty but fragile and even as a grown woman her parents kept a tight hold of her. They feared she would take ill if she left their sight. 

One day, she finally broke their resolve by promising only to go to the bookshop that was across the street from their apartment. Inside, she met Father and was instantly swept off her feet by his charm and beauty. And for the first time in his very long existence, he was swept off of his feet as well. He had never met a mortal who so resonated within his soul.

They formed a close bond that became a relationship that eventually led to one passionate night. Soon enough, she informed him of the twins that she was carrying, my brother and I. He fell from grace and never knew that she died during our birth. He also never knew (until we later found him) that his fall impacted us as well. Where once his wings were pure white, now they are stained as if by soot. Mine, when I dare to stretch them in this dark corner of our headspace, are dappled gray and Liam’s are much the same, but darker still. 

He’ll never tell you of our father’s sin that marked us for eternity. He’ll never show you the physical proof of his status as heavenly outcast. Instead, he will remain silent and afraid and I will protect him until both of us fade.